I have a lot of conversations with people who ask me if I ever get frustrated, irritated or intimidated working with sorority women. They all stay the same age and year after year of paying my mortgage I am constantly reminded that I am… unfortunately… even though I have a crazy beauty regiment… getting older. I have such an easy answer: no, not even kind of. See I have worked with the most talented, intelligent, capable, beautiful, fun and fabulous women in the world every day of my life since I was 18 years old. My best friends in the world are the most ‘intimidating’ people in the world. It has at points intimidated me. Now it pushes me:
- Surround yourself with people you want to be like. I want to be like a college-aged woman for one big reason. I want to believe the world is innately good. I don’t want to be torn down or broken by the system and red tape. I want to be consumed with people who believe that kindness changes the world. I want to work with people who see problems in the world and are hell-bent to fix it, obstacles be damned. That is what college students are like – hell bent. I love that. I want to remain aggressively positive, romantically optimistic, and glue rose colored glasses onto my face. Sorority women do that for me every day. They help me see the good in every emotion.
- Re-Define Beautiful. I used to be intimidated by women with perfect bodies, hair and clothing. I used to look at women who had it all and feel like I had nothing. One day I realized that women who appeared to have everything still look at themselves and wish they could be someone else. I no longer define beauty by the way a woman is packaged, but rather the way she lights up when she talks about something. The most beautiful souls in the world are so passionate about something it makes them scream. It is not very hard to get a great contouring kit at Ulta. But finding the thing in the world you want to dedicate your life to is a labor of love and the most beautiful characteristic in a person. One day I realized that there was a possibility people would look at me like I had it all together, and I vowed to myself then and there to always show the whole truth, the mess, the fear, the flaws and the fierce… because rarely do we as women get role models who are put up on that pedestal and still admit imperfections.
- Find out what makes you feel prepared. It took me a long time to find out what made me feel strong, capable and prepared to seize the day. Unfortunately for me, a lot of that is exercise and getting ready in the morning. I talk about a lot in my programs about the amount of pressure I put on myself to be what I think I need to be. I also know that it is a fine line in between pushing yourself and pushing yourself too far. So, I am still balancing the act of too much and not enough of feeling ‘good enough.’ If you are too, you are not alone.
I suppose when I see all of these perfect, beautiful, young, smart, fashionable college women I see the charade they put on to look effortless, put together,flawless, and laid back… because I did it for so long… and I still am. I am them, with a full time career. So no, I do not get intimidated. It is the same way you look back at old pictures of yourself, you don’t get intimidated. They are me, and I am them… it is why I love them so much… because I feel their joy and their pain, and I am still living it today.